Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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