You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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