I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
i believe in u and ur pee
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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