You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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