im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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