So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize
