sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I'm having to shit out rocks
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
