(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
