somebody snuck up and got me drunk
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
