So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
operation harelip BJ is a go
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be your penis for a week.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
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