Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
