Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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