Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
