hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
