I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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