Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Randomize
