Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
