I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
They have beer where we have blood.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
