Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED

  (1-603): View more from New Hampshire

  I feel like half our conversations start this way.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED (1-603): I feel like half our conversations start this way. http://tfl.nu/9770
  Replies (16) Good night (6081) Bad night (788)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  ugly people sure do ruin things

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): ugly people sure do ruin things http://tfl.nu/4ggc
  Replies (33) Good night (1087) Bad night (3258)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  im holly from the hills drunk

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): im holly from the hills drunk http://tfl.nu/ouvm
  Replies (18) Good night (3828) Bad night (914)
• Favorite

  (712): View more from Iowa

  He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (712): He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!! http://tfl.nu/bjv4
  Replies (15) Good night (741) Bad night (5280)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex. http://tfl.nu/8evv
  Replies (65) Good night (3641) Bad night (1176)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.

  (928): View more from Arizona

  wow.

  (815): View more from Illinois

  But it's a REALLY good back rub.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub. (928): wow. (815): But it's a REALLY good back rub. http://tfl.nu/3vfg
  Replies (27) Good night (5104) Bad night (928)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night. http://tfl.nu/vd8i
  Replies (4) Good night (2548) Bad night (1165)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start. http://tfl.nu/5fft
  Replies (3) Good night (734) Bad night (2799)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices. http://tfl.nu/tes7
  Replies (5) Good night (2443) Bad night (1159)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard? http://tfl.nu/d7iq
  Replies (5) Good night (919) Bad night (497)
• Favorite

  (936): View more from Texas

  Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (936): Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check http://tfl.nu/ivap
  Replies (4) Good night (785) Bad night (404)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS? http://tfl.nu/pnaa
  Replies (6) Good night (1048) Bad night (488)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses." http://tfl.nu/iu6o
  Replies (2) Good night (917) Bad night (284)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar http://tfl.nu/h9fi
  Replies (1) Good night (507) Bad night (341)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip. http://tfl.nu/819n
  Replies (4) Good night (272) Bad night (447)

Randomize