so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?