the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
