chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
You can't just leave with hair like that
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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