You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Come see our sink grown plant.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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