i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
