i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
