Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
