Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
