Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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