it wasn't lemon gatorade
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Randomize
