That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
