Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
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He is like the real live version of the state fair..
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
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She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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