I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
he shaved USA in his pubs
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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