do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize