at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
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