you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize