Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
