Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
