is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
