he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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