He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
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Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
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She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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