Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
