Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize