You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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