a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
