I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
