i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
