I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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