Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
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