were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
So much Jack, so little girl.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Randomize
