I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize