I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Randomize
