i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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