..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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