Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Come see our sink grown plant.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
