Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
